I don’t care for the “I’m sorry”… but a sincere understanding and a possible “let me make it up to you!” idk.. I know when I’m wrong and I hate myself when I am.. I’ll stay quiet and let the other person vent out their frustration. I’ll become a human punching bag because I feel like I deserve it. Why can’t other people do that?? just become a punching bag, let me beat the shit out of you!! YOU DESERVE IT! hahahah idk. but I do hate how people just expect me to get back on my feet after they’ve pushed me down, and then they expect me to smile and catch up to them. nah, not me. not anymore.

If I haven’t gained at least 5 pounds of muscle by the end of this month. I’m going to shoot my knee cap off. I don’t deserve em’ .

when I want to jibber jabber. :( 

just me and my bitch.

not sure if it’s because I’ve been sick all week, but I’ve been super depressed. maybe it has to do with being broke, or living with stupid childish males, or not even having a job that I enjoy doing. I don’t miss school, but I kinda wish I had an art class. I’m definitely going back for the fall, sign up for financial aid and yep. but I feel like the little passion I had for living has faded away, and now I’m just a blob on my bed. 

• walk dog/throw trash
• cook food
• eat food
• find new job
• download music
• finish watching “pi”
• cuddle with dog
• more eat?

if I should feel good or ashamed that I was able to eat a large cheese pizza from Little Ceasar’s all by myself, I’m only two slices away.

I fuckin’ miss my sister. :/ I want her to come back so I can give her a great big hug and tell her how much I miss her. 

I was suppose to shower two hours ago! now my foot’s asleep and I don’t want to move anymore. :(

can I just have a friend who drives and is willing to bring me food? , it would be highly appreciated. - sincerely yours. 

being a fuckin’ tourist.

Be Jealous. ;)